Big isn't beautiful

I gained even more. It's fucking digusting.
Fucking Mia needs to fucking die, because all I've been doing since hanging around her is fucking eat and eat and get fatter and fatter and I just want to fucking die or never leave (not)my bed.
I'm really not playing around here. Image is fucking everything to me. EVERYFUCKINGTHING. I was on my way to looking so lovely again during spring break. I wasn't even trying to lose then either, but it just fucking happened and I fucking loved it.

And now look at me.
I can't stand looking at my hideous non-figure. I can't even stand thinking about it. The only almost-okay thing I can find about my nastiness is that I'm living in Yakima right now, where even the walls are borderline-obese. Ugh.
I have less than one month to beat my lowest, because I'm not even going to fucking settle for anything less. Or rather, anything more.
Wish me luck, and if you see me go near any sort of greasy filth in this city, just fucking shoot me where I stand. I'll start carrying spinach around, if that's what it takes.
Otherwise I just may have to start wearing Missy Elliot-style trash bag suits to hide this disgusting fat that has consumed my entire being.

Don't even dare try to say anything to me about it either, because everyone has fucking noticed that since my last move (to the land of 395672 calories per bite) I've done nothing but gain. I was always so fucking repulsed by the way those around me never gave a shit about how they come off, and now I've turned into them.
Someone, just fucking stab me.